Nippon gets some things off chest for New Year's

The Japanese always have to outperform the United States.

They made our stereos smaller and cars more reliable. They laugh at our reality shows, saying "We eat that crap already, round-eye!" They eat over 50 hot dogs in one minute at our hot dog competitions. Their chefs are iron, while ours are presumably made of human flesh and presented by Bill Shatner.

Now they've out-breasted our Super Bowl.