'X-Files' already did it

Yup, sometimes reporters can be just so lame. I mean, Mulder already mentioned in one episode of The X-Files that most lakes contain microscopic amoeba that can eat your brain with no qualms or problem.

Hold up. Wait a minute. This is real? Oh boy. Hope you all got that swimming jive out of you. Well, at least the amoeba doesn't fuse to the brain stem, taking over the basic functions of the brain, and reanimating the dead body as a flesh-eating zombie. Nonetheless, I propose that we drain all the lakes, concrete them over and build various fast food and coffee franchise outlets upon them. IT'S THE ONLY WAY TO BE SURE.