Bear cannot bear 'War on Animals'

We, here at SG, are always proud to report stories of humanity defeating animals behind enemy lines. Today's story comes from Grovedale, Canada. (Apparently Canadians are just as ballsy as Americans when it comes to bear fights.)

The guy fought off a mother bear with a "machete-style hunting knife," suffering only bites, scratches and a possible broken limb, after accidentally walking between her and her cubs. He reported that, in return, he stabbed the bear three times before she cowardly cut-and-ran.

There is no report as to whether the bear died from her wounds, but if she did, the cubs will go next. Three stabs, two generations? Not bad.

Our celebration of this victory comes with one admonishment: always, always, ALWAYS confirm the kill.