'Teletubbies responsible for all wars in world!'

A first grade teacher was arrested at her school after showing up to work drunk. We can only wonder what her lesson plan was. Presumably incoherrant, but awesome:

• Paradoxes/plot holes in the Berenstein Bears series.
  
• Why nice guys never get girls because girls are in love with assholes.
  
• Sharon, Lois and Bram are underappreciated by today's music standards.
  
• She loves you all, and she doesn't say it nearly enough. No really, did anyone ever tell you how funny you are? She means, damn.

All in all, we have to say that this, technically, is better than sleeping with her students, but far less titilating news-wise.